Sunday, 6 October 2013 – 5:19 PM
| Comments Off on A long-overdue Bent Alaska update — October 2013
Bent Alaska’s blog will continue in hiatus indefinitely; but the Bent Alaska Facebook Group on Facebook is thriving — join us! A long-overdue update from Bent Alaska’s editor.
Monday, 1 March 2010 – 8:28 AM
| Comments Off on Advice from a (former) Hater: Gay in small town Alaska
Memoirs of a Badman is a blog about a gay family in rural Alaska. The blogger, identified only as Z, writes about life with his bipolar husband K, and K’s young daughter A. In this post, a homophobic neighbor sees that Z and K are going through a difficult time and offers support and advice, with unexpected consequences:
——
Have you ever got the best advice from your hater?
That might not be the exact thing that happened to me, yet it was pretty much the same.
On a pretty frigid sunny (or sunny frigid) winter noon… well, it was past 3 so it must have been afternoon. Anyway, me and A were out enjoying ourselves. Actually she was trying her brand new bike with Pinkie sitting in the front seat aka the yellow plastic basket.
As usual I was half mad, half worried and slightly happy sharing the joy of riding something as cool as a pink new bike with little A.
My reasons were clear: after long hours of negotiating (read begging on my knees), K’s former boss accorded giving a job to K. Since no one is crazy enough to come to an icy hell at this time of year when the temperature tends to go below 0, K’s job was still vacant, so in reality he got his old job back. So the following day K was going to work after several jobless months and to me he looked anything but ready.
Firstly, most of the weekend he was sick with stomachache.
Secondly, he was still sleeping 12+ hours a day.
Thirdly, he looked extremely depressed.
Lastly, he made me worried and helpless not knowing what to do.
To sum it up, I knew there was something I could do, however I had no idea what it was.
Deeply consumed in my thoughts, we reached A’s favorite place, the Pinkie’s park.
Excitedly she ran to the play-ground, ignoring the possibility of her bike hitting the ground, so I had to loosen my thoughts and cover the distance to grab the bike before experiencing any close contact with the ice beneath. Thanks God I’m not that old yet and I can still react quick enough.
The night in AK approaches fast, besides the darkness and cold is not something you want to face often, thus we had to return home soon.
Walking down the street, oblivious to my surroundings, the only thing that could catch my attention was the tires screeching on the icy road.
“Hey Z, it’s gettin dark, let us give you a ride.” The driver said stopping a few inches away from A’s bike. It was our neighbors.
Though the lady is extremely friendly, her husband is so different and amuses me to no end. Before going to Boston, he looked like one of the gay-bashing crowd, however, since our return, he’s become unbelieving friendly. The reason is still unknown but I will share as soon as I find out.
With no intention of turning into ice blocks, I accepted their offer. 10 minutes later, A and pinkie were back to their carrot party and the couple was sitting on the warm and cozy couch, ready to taste the new recipe I made for lunch, salmon sushi rolls.
K didn’t like it but A absolutely loved it so I needed more volunteers to decide on making it again or not.
******
“Why don’t you seduce him?” E, the neighbor, blurted out while helping me with cleaning up.
“Excuse me?” I was pretty sure we were not on the same page.
“K’s your husband, isn’t he?”
“Not here. Anyway, what’s your point?”
“As far as I know there’s no husband-wife role/boundary in gay relationships, right?”
I nodded.
“So what are you waiting for? You don’t think it’s his responsibility to always initiate everything, do you?”
“Initiate what? You don’t have any idea what you are talking about. I’m giving him some time and a little space. That’s it.”
I shrugged my shoulders and started covering the plates with washing liquid (maybe too much of that).
“You are letting him go, losing him. If you’re not willing to do anything on your own, me and H (his wife) are more than willing to help.”
“Correct me please. Wasn’t it you a while ago who asked your wife not to ever talk to the queer couple living next door? Weren’t you the one who left your garbage at our front door? Weren’t you calling us names not long ago? Should I continue or is it enough?”
He went quiet and I bit my lower lip not to say something I might regret later, rolled up my sleeves and dug deep in the sink to find the invisible spoons.
But the silence was cutting deep into my conscience. I knew I didn’t have to be mean to the guy who tried hard to be nice, but I was pissed off with all the people pretending to be nice to us when they were all S.O.B.s.
“Sorry for harassing you guys, I didn’t know you well at the time and misjudged you.” He broke the silence standing close to me. Too close actually that he was right in the middle of my private space, shredding it to pieces. I could feel his warmth and smell and it felt so good I wanted to lean my head on his shoulder, I wanted to feel his skin under mine, I wanted to smell him, taste him, devour him…………….
WHAT THE FUCK AM I THINKING? I nearly crashed my head against the cabinet when he rested his hand on my shoulder.
“My wife adores you guys and missed you a lot. It’s good to have you back, we thought you weren’t coming again. She will feel devastated to lose you or see you break-up.”
I almost didn’t hear his explanation, still shocked of my own thoughts… God what was wrong with me? I’ve never fancied another guy, let alone a homophobic one.
******
Follow the adventures of Z and K, their daughter, relatives, and neighbors in rural Alaska on the blog Memoirs of a Badman.
Thursday, 25 February 2010 – 1:15 PM
| Comments Off on Arctic Heat 2010
Arctic Heat Weekend is here! Come out and support the men and women candidates for Alaska Bear Cub, Mr. Alaska Bear, Mr. Alaska Leather, and Ms. Alaska Leather during this weekend of Fur and Leather fun.
This will be your first chance to meet all the contestants and judges for the contest. We’ll have food, raffle items, a slave auction, and other Men’s Club goodness. This is a great time to meet new members of the club and get information about club events.
Arctic Heat Competition
Saturday, February 27th @ Mad Myrna’s
8 PM Doors Open, 9 PM Contest Starts
Tickets: $10.00
All candidates will be judged on the following three areas: Bar Wear, Fetish Wear, and Full Title Attire. We’ll have live entertainment, door prizes, auctions, and of course hot hairy men, and hot leather daddies (of all genders.)
Victory Brunch
Sunday, February 28th @ Mad Myrna’s
11 AM Cocktail Hour, 12 PM Brunch
Ticket: $15.00
Celebrate the victories of our new title holders. We’ll have a delicious buffet style brunch and fun entertainment.
* * *
A note from the Men’s Club: The Last Frontier Men’s Club has dropped it’s membership fee. The club recognizes that during difficult economic times it maybe challenging to some of our members to pay dues, so we have decided to go dues-free. But we are still a members club, and you must submit a membership to be an official part of the club. This membership helps us verify that members are over 21, are male, and are currently living in Alaska.
Half Naked Pictionary is another Men’s Club event, happening on the 1st Wednesday of every month, at Mad Myrna’s from 9-11 p.m. Come have fun with half naked men this Wednesday! Hosted by Men’s Club President Tom.
Wednesday, 24 February 2010 – 7:16 AM
| Comments Off on PrideFest 2010 theme and dates announced
Alaska’s gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender communities (and our fabulous straight allies) will demonstrate our PRIDE for 10 colorful days in June as we celebrate Anchorage PrideFest 2010. Our theme is 2010 A PRIDE ODYSSEY.
Anchorage PrideFest 2010 will take place June 18-27. During this ten-day period, various non-profit, social, and business organizations will host special events at venues around Anchorage. A highlight of PrideFest is always the Celebrating Diversity Parade which will take place at 11 a.m. on Saturday June 26 through the heart of downtown Anchorage, where we hope to see a record crowd. After the Parade, please join us for the Festival on the Delaney Park Strip from noon until 6 p.m. The Festival will feature live entertainment, vendors, food, friends, a kiddie carnival, and fun, all under the glorious Anchorage summer sun.
To make this year’s PrideFest a success, we need the support of our entire community… sponsors, donors, parade entries, festival entertainers, vendors, groups who sponsor events, hundreds of volunteers… you name it, we need it. Thank you for making it great each year!!
If you are interested in helping in any way with this year’s PrideFest festivities, please join us at our next planning meeting. You don’t need any skills, just a passion for pride, willingness to work as a team and the expectation to have fun. We are aiming to have as many groups and regions as possible throughout Alaska represented in our planning.
The next meeting is Wednesday, February 24, at 6:30 pm at the Gay & Lesbian Community Center in Anchorage. If you are outside of Anchorage, we can arrange a speaker phone. For more info, send us an e-mail.
Award-winning and gay-friendly comedian Kathy Griffin is performing in Anchorage on Friday March 5 at the PAC.
In addition to stand-up comedy, Griffin played a lesbian activist on a recent episode of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit and posed for the NoH8 photo project. She also escorted Levi Johnston to the Teen Choice Awards, and joked that they are engaged and she’s carrying his baby.
“Kathy invades Alaska for one night only in March. Make sure to get your tickets early for this rare stop. In addition, Kathy will be stopping at Borders (1100 East Dimond Boulevard, Anchorage) at noon sharp for a very special book signing. Please call in advance for any special instructions the store may have: 907-344-4099.”
“Multiple HBO and Bravo specials weren’t enough! Catch double Emmy award winning Kathy Griffin live in her true element. She has more stories, more dish, more of what she shouldn’t say but you know you want to hear. Chicago native Kathy Griffin is a multi-faceted performer with a rapid fire wit. Come with an open mind and laugh until you puke . . . Just a little.”
Griffin loves “her gays” and will definitely have gay and lesbian fans at the Anchorage show. She even looked for – and found – gay soldiers when entertaining troops in Afghanistan, in this video clip from her DVD Allegedly:
Her fourth stand-up comedy DVD She’ll Cut A Bitch was released in January. Learn more at Kathy Griffin’s home page.
Tickets are $65 for the main floor and $45 for the mezzanine and balcony, and are available through the Alaska Center for the Performing Arts event page for Kathy Griffin.
Amber lived in Alaska before going to work in Uganda. Last week she witnessed an anti-gay demonstration, and the experience triggered this response, forwarded by a reader:
————
I’ve got to put this down…
its 11:57 pm and i’m sweaty and tired. after emails and phone meetings and evening shopping at the market and necklace class and compound hunting and lots of other things, sleep should come easy. maybe it’s too much sweet tea or monitor glare.
today my progress was twice blocked by an anti-homosexual march. i was driving down main street and noticed some mzungus (white people) on motorbikes carrying pastel-colored signs and honking horns and yelling. i was intrigued until i read the signs. the crowd driving and marching down the street got thicker until the whole road was blocked. by that time i was trying to make a right-hand turn across that side of main street. (yes, we drive on the left here) and was trapped watching as hundreds walked and drove carrying signs of the most hateful nature. i eventually made my right turn and did my commercial business and there they were again, blocking my path for a second time. i don’t often feel rageful, but sometimes i think indignation is appropriate.
today i hated americans. i hate right-wing religious zealots who think its ok to promote the government-sanctioned killing of people they don’t like in places where government-sanctioned killing turns into genocide. i hate people who incite an underfed, undereducated population into taking to the streets when angry mobs kill people who happen to cross their paths. i hate all people who just watched the hatred go by. i hate that this is another reason not to live in this place and trust these people. i hate that colonialist westerners continue to come here and leave their oppressive, self-loathing fear of everything behind. i hate that this country will be seen as ignorant and intolerant and will be ignored by NGOs who say they are only here to help. i hate the sanctimonious bullshit that comes out of black and white mouths. i hate that people i love don’t want to come here to visit me because they will have to hide who they are.
later in the day, i realized there are more things i hate. i hate that women i know have to have more children than they know they can take care of. i hate that they have to choose between getting their teeth fixed and feeding their children. i hate that they don’t know that soda causes cavities and that they don’t know what cavities are. i hate that their clothes are ripped and falling apart and pregnant women wear shirts they can’t button because they don’t have any other clothes. i hate that they aren’t hateful and are able laugh and smile and have a good time while they are experiencing these things. i hate when i see this and i feel small and stupid. i hate that i whine about paper cuts and sweatyness to people who have teeth pulled with no anesthesia and have never experienced indoor plumbing. i hate that they show me that i have the choice to be hateful.
it’s 12:16 am. a new day. maybe today i won’t be hateful. maybe i’ll look at what i have and what i have done and feel satisfied that the equation balances. maybe i’ll go use my indoor plumbing and accept the truth that it just takes more everything to keep me alive and functioning and i’m lucky because i’ve never had to suffer. maybe i’ll go to sleep and feel better because
Friday, 19 February 2010 – 5:00 PM
| Comments Off on This Week in LGBT Alaska 2/19/10
I’ve been on medical leave the last few weeks, but will return to regular posting when I’m able. Here are this week’s LGBT events from the statewide newsletter Alaska GLBT News.
Juneau
Pride Chorus “Eyes on Chicago” Concert 2/20, silent auction at 6:30, music at 7:30 p.m. at the Juneau Arts & Culture Center.
SEAGLA Social Fridays (6-8 p.m.) for GLBT people and our friends over 21, at The Imperial Bar.
Fairbanks
UAF Gay-Straight Alliance Meeting 4 p.m on 2/19 in the Alumni Lounge, and GSA Bowling in the Wood Center 3:30 p.m. on 2/20.
Jeff’s Jungle Party with DJ Nicole, for over 21 LGBT’s and allies 2/20, begins at 9 p.m. off Sheep Creek Road.
Wednesday Social at 9 p.m. Contact Joshua for the current location.
Mat-Su Valley
Mat-Su LGBT Community Center in Palmer is open M-F 5-8 p.m. (except 6-8 on Wed.) The social group meets Wednesdays, 5-6 p.m. at Vagabond Blues.
Sunday, 14 February 2010 – 11:32 AM
| Comments Off on k.d.lang’s queer Alaskan Valentine
k.d. lang sings – and howls – the love song Barefoot from her movie Salmonberries, which takes place in Kotzebue, Alaska. Although the video does not show her feet, she is bare from the chest up. Happy Valentine’s Day!
Friday, 12 February 2010 – 4:50 PM
| Comments Off on This Week in LGBT Alaska 2/12/10
Happy Valentine’s Day! This week’s LGBT events from the statewide newsletter Alaska GLBT News.
Juneau
SEAGLA Valentine’s Dance 2/14, 8 p.m. at the Silverbow, all ages, everyone welcome. $10 suggested donation.
Social Fridays (6-8 p.m.) for GLBT people and our friends over 21, at The Imperial Bar.
Fairbanks
Wednesday Social at 9 p.m. Contact Joshua for the current location.
Mat-Su Valley
Mat-Su LGBT Community Center in Palmer is open M-F 5-8 p.m. (except 6-8 on Wed.) The social group meets Wednesdays, 5-6 p.m. at Vagabond Blues.
Anchorage
Hypnotic Journey: Jay Her’s Comedy Hypnosis Show 2/12, 7:30 p.m. Colleen Crinklaw opens with stand up comedy. UAA’s Wendy Williamson Auditorium. Tickets $20 at the door, cash only.
PrideProm 2010 planning meeting 2/13, 11:30 a.m. at the GLCCA.
“Sweetheart’s Dinner” 2/13, Cocktails at 6pm and Dinner at 7pm, at Mad Myrna’s. $20, annual fundraiser for ICOAA.
MCCA Retreat: “Newness” 2/13, 12-2 p.m. open to all.
Love Your Gay Neighbor Valentine’s Day Party 2/14, 3-4:30 p.m. At MCC Anchorage, after the 2 p.m. Sunday service.
New LGBT Book Lovers Club meets at the GLCCA 2/17, 6:15 p.m. showing the movie Jane Austin’s Book Club and choosing books to read and discuss.
The very real consequences of DADT repeal; seeking survivor benefits for same-sex partner of Alaska shooting victim; waiting on SCOTUS decision about whether it will hear Prop 8 case; and other recent LGBTQ news selected by Sara Boesser in Juneau, Alaska.
In this month’s “Ask Lambda Legal” column, Lambda Legal answers a question about the federal government’s longstanding ban against donations of blood from men who have sex with men (MSM).
Alaska Pride Conference 2012 kicks off on October 5 with a First Friday showing at Tref.Punkt Studio of Love is Love, a photographic exhibit of LGBT couples from across the state.
United for marriage: Light the way to justice. The U.S. Supreme Court will hear oral arguments this Tuesday and Wednesday, March 26–27, in two cases about freedom to marry. Please join us on Tuesday, March 26, at the federal courthouse in Anchorage (7th & C) in a circle united for equality.
Pariah, a critically acclaimed film about a 17-year-old African-American woman embracing her lesbian identity, will screen at UAA on Friday, November 2, and will be followed by a discussion on acceptance in honor of Mya Dale. The event is free and open to the public.
Arctic Heat Weekend is here! Come out and support the men and women candidates for Alaska Bear Cub, Mr. Alaska Bear, Mr. Alaska Leather, and Ms. Alaska Leather during this weekend of Fur and Leather fun.
Prevo divorce documents raise “loosey-goosey” questions about Anchorage Baptist Temple house
Another few laps: Reports of Prop 5’s demise are premature (& proof Minnery knew he was spreading false information)
A mournful Pride
Wasilla Gays to Levi: We’re here
Anchorage and Fairbanks fight the H8, protest Prop 8!
A long-overdue Bent Alaska update — October 2013
Dance in the Streets and Increase the Beat: New Steps Forward for Pridefest 2013
Light the Way to Justice: Tuesday, March 26 in Anchorage
Sara’s News, 11/5/12: Marriage equality on the ballot tomorrow in four states
A word from our editor…
